Carmen Simon‘s session on attracting attention was the keynote for Tuesday morning. Although she used the term “seduction” a lot during the session, what Carmen actually meant was seduction of another kind — to be used in scenarios related to both personal and business lives. So why did she use the term “seduction” rather than just “attraction”? That’s because Carmen was inspired by a book called The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists.
After reading the book, Carmen became intrigued by the concept, if only for “research” reasons. According to Carmen, Neil Strauss, the book’s author applied the principles he explains to 13,000 people of varied races and nationalities. In fact, when he applied these principles for a year, he ended up collecting 2000 phone numbers!
Other books Carmen mentioned include Nancy Friday’s My Secret Garden and Influence
by Robert Cialdini. She also noted with interest how Brad Pitt performed in Meet Joe Black and also Pierce Brosnan’s act in The Thomas Crown Affair.
Seduction in the conventional sense may be a culmination of an activity — but culmination may be something different too — such as gaining a phone number or selling a phone! In each case, you must make adjustments to your personality. Carmen added that Survival of the Smoothest is always assured — she also mentioned that Religion, life, politics, and presentations are all pickup.
Whatever your pickup or seduction tricks may be, it is important that you use proper sequencing during the entire act, and all these three concepts must be utilized in this exact sequence:
Carmen then had some volunteers demonstrate the art of seduction. Two men wooed a woman to get her phone number. And a man and woman both tried to sell an “iPhone for the second hand” to a business prospect. All these demonstrations invoked plenty of laughter from the audience.
Carmen then emphasized that whatever we may do to seduce a prospect, you must open your act in either of these ways:
Be Indirect (camouflaged, and thus spark curiosity).
The result of your seduction act must be so that you end up teaching your prospects something about themselves — remember also that “everybody loves themselves”.
Some more thoughts from Carmen:
Use value-demonstrating techniques
When you use the word “because”, you put things in a frame and add legitimacy.
When you don’t use the word “because”, it might mean that you don’t have the time or interest in the person you are talking to.
Don’t do what everyone else does. Ever.
Give them a reason to continue the conversation. What is your conversation piece?
Screen them as much as they screen you.
Be picky — picky people are winners.
Always leave them better than you found them.
The not successful ones are the ones that open up the room, and say here I am.
The successful ones are the ones that open up the room, and say here you are.
If you know where to stop, you can go anywhere.
Here are some screening questions:
Is there more to you than meets the eye?
Are you a passionate person?
There are a lot of people but I am impressed by your intelligence and energy, the little things that make you unique.
Carmen Simon is a cognitive neuroscientist, author, and founder of Memzy, a company that uses brain science to help corporations create memorable messages. Carmen’s most recent book, “Impossible to Ignore: Create Memorable Content to Influence Decisions,” has won the acclaim of publications such as Inc.com, Forbes and Fast Company and has been selected as one of the top international books on persuasion. Carmen holds two doctorates, one in instructional technology and another in cognitive psychology. Carmen speaks frequently to corporate, academic, and government audiences on the importance of using brain science to craft communication that is not only memorable but sparks action. After all, what’s the use of memory if people don’t act on it?
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